When Kids Say Nothing

Without fail, my son Abram will come home from school and the first question I ask is, “How was your day?”

He responds, “Good.”

I ask, “What did you learn about today?”

“Nothing,” he says.

The same answer pertains to questions about recess, soccer and football practice. Sound familiar?

This goes on, day in and day out, until at last, he breaks his silence. Usually this takes place on the family road trips to Kansas City or Omaha, at which point he becomes a chatterbox and backseat driver. “Dad, did you know you aren’t supposed to talk on your cell phone while driving?” “Dad, my teacher says…” This goes on and on. Go ahead and raise your hand if this has happened to you.

I’m always up for engaging learning opportunities, and hit him back with follow up questions pertaining to the topic. “No,” I say. “I didn’t know that. Please tell me more.” He will continue for another ten minutes or so, questioning Valerie and I about whatever comes to mind until he changes the subject. “Can we watch a movie?” he’ll ask. You would think this might make the trip more enjoyable for the adults because then we can watch the road, keep the kids safe, and enjoy the road noise over the radio.  Instead I hear, “Let It Go” for the hundredth time. You see, in order for the kids to hear their movie, I have to turn down the car radio. It’s the small things.

Upon the arrival at Grandma’s house the questions roll his way again and he answers with the typical, “I don’t know, nothing.” It’s like pulling teeth to get a straight answer from this boy.

Sometimes, it can be a battle when kids say nothing, and I’ve heard it doesn’t get easier as they grow older. The only option (as I see it) for a parent these days is to remain calm, stay patient and search for understanding. Above all, it is important to continue asking the questions whether they respond in detail or not; just because you get the “nothing” response, doesn’t mean your child doesn’t need the question in the first place.