As I was watching my husband take our daughter’s senior pictures, I realized I am at a crossroads of jealousy and admiration. Jealous of the bond between my husband and our oldest daughter. He witnessed every first in her life: the first time she rolled over, her first word, her first step, her first day in daycare, her first elementary field trip, her first homecoming dance.
Our daughter wants to travel with her dad. She looks for him to get a hug after every softball game. She chooses me when she needs to shop or has forgotten something. She doesn’t even like me going to physical therapy because I talk too much.
He’s Always There for Her
Yet I admire the bond because it’s nothing unique or extraordinary. He has just showed up. He showed up when I returned to work after maternity leave. He showed up when she was a terrible sleeper and would only sleep when he rocked her in her car seat for hours upon hours. He showed up when she wanted to refurbish an old piano bench. He showed up when she wanted to play softball and the team needed a coach. He showed up when she needed a shoulder to cry on after she did terrible on a test. He shows up when our daughter is approaching curfew to make sure she is home safe and sound.
Just by showing up he has taught her many life lessons. What I have noticed the most are the lessons to love, to be adventurous and to radiate confidence.
He’s an Incredible Model of Support
We all see how my husband has modeled love to his family and his profession. He does not miss any of our children’s events. Even when he cannot physically be there, he shows up virtually and sends text messages before and after to show his support. Our daughter sees the value and the importance of showing up, as she has commented: “I don’t want to miss anything of my kids’, just like you, Mom and Dad.”
“Go on the adventure. Try it. Let’s do this.” From $100 adventure days to trying new foods to traveling, my husband has instilled a sense of adventure in our daughter. It’s both of them that now drive our family’s traveling experiences. Even when my husband takes her up a 700-foot tower just to see the views or try Pickled Wrinkles, he is encouraging her to appreciate life beyond our little town. I pray no one ever takes away the sense of wonder, the sense of curiosity and the sense of adventure he has taught her.
He’s Helped Bolster Her Confidence
Even though our daughter does not have the confidence to decide where or what she wants to eat, that is completely overshadowed by the confidence she radiates in other circumstances. When our daughter wanted to learn how to play softball, my husband was there to play catch with her each day and to coach her. Now when she steps in the batter’s box or centerfield, you can see the confidence in her eyes. When she wanted to learn about photography, he spent hours helping her develop this skill. Now when she is behind the lens, you can see her smiles knowing she just took the perfect picture.
He is always there. Always. He is determined to not miss anything as she begins the last of all of her high school activities: the last softball game, the last One-Act performance, the last track meet and the last time she walks down the senior hall. As our daughter walks across the stage to receive her diploma, I am sure there will be a hug and a tear shed between dad and daughter. I am sure at that moment I will have a few tears. However, those tears will be of joy and admiration, as I have had a front row seat watching the bond of a father and daughter grow, just because her father showed up.
Shelly Mowinkel
K-12 & Teens
My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.
