Recognizing My Gift is Joy

Recognizing My Gift is Joy

Today I started the day out in a rush. I hit my snooze button for an extra 30 minutes. I took a little longer to put makeup on, brush my teeth and walk out the door. Little did I know a handful of colored circles with wobbly lines would change my day.

Needing to Slow Down

Once I arrived at school it seemed as if I had left my checklist completely unattended the day before and there were already six new items to check off before the warning bell rang. To start the day, there was a tech issue in the Spanish classroom and I explained in my best Spanish, “Yo estoy rapido en la mañana!” All the students looked at me with a look of confusion. The actual Spanish teacher explained, “I was in a hurry this morning.”

My day started out in a rush and feeling behind. I kept reminding myself I needed that extra sleep and time this morning just to prepare myself for the day. I kept focusing on the big picture of the day. I wanted to control what needed to be checked off on my list and became very frustrated when I remembered things to keep adding to this list. At one point in the morning, my daughter kindly asked, “Mom, do you need me to help you today? You seem so rushed.”

It’s the Little Things that Matter

And before I knew it, I was abruptly reminded at about 8:30, 9:15, 10:20 and then again at 11:10, that the little things are what bring us joy. Two text messages, a reminder that a “to do” list is overrated, a “this is so cool” comment from a seventh-grader, and the excited “oohs” from kindergarteners.

Yes, four times I was reminded to look at the simple, little things. I don’t think I was intentionally ignoring the small moments of joy, I just think I wasn’t “seeing” those moments. The fourth reminder came from my little kindergartener friends. They showed me joy is right in front of me, they showed me simplicity brings joy. In my small time frame with kindergarteners today, I brought joy to them by showing them how to color little circles with wobbly lines using technology. Yet, they reminded me of my life word — joy.

“Your Gift is Joy”

Later on in the day, I was teaching my Intro to Business students a lesson on leadership and a quote from my mom popped up on one of the slides, which I had forgotten I had typed. My mom told me prior to her passing away, “Shelly your gift is joy, share it daily with your students.” It took me everything to hold back tears.

My day needed to start out in a hurry, because I needed to be reminded of the joy the simple/little things bring us in life. Some days I get caught up looking at the big picture, looking at the big goal, I forget it is about the small things that we do that allow us to have the greatest impact on those around us. I am thankful for those wobbly colored circles as they reminded me that my greatest gift is the joy I share with others.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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Sending Our Daughter Off to College

Sending Our Daughter Off to College

“Good parents give their children roots and wings. Roots to know where home is, wings to fly away and exercise what’s been taught to them.” – Jonas Salk

As we walk the path of parenting, I’m sure you’ve read or heard this quote many times. Lately, a version of this quote has been on my heart. My husband and I are preparing to send our oldest daughter back to college. Not only is she going back to college, but she’s also moving into an apartment and we fully recognize she won’t be moving back home next year.

Preparing for the Change

Is my 40-something heart ready for this? I’m not sure. I know, though, that this is the circle of life, and we prepare our children and ourselves for this time. I remember whispering to our three-month old daughter that I would teach her the tools to keep her grounded but when the time came, I would give her the wings of independence.

For nearly 20 years, what we’ve taught her has been deeply rooted in faith, hard work, joy and wanderlust. And now, I must hold up the other end of the deal and let her fly. She’s more than ready, but my heart is still heavy and full of joy.

The Transition at Home

Then I look at our other two children and how much they’ve loved having their sister home this summer. They’ll also have an adjustment period. Our sophomore daughter will no longer have those extra clothes and shoes around the house. She’ll be upgraded to oldest sibling status and her responsibilities will change. She’ll get the opportunity to be the chauffeur for her brother—just like her older sister did for her.

Our junior high son will tell you he’s taking over his sister’s room immediately, but deep down he feels as if his best friend is moving out again. He’s going to miss his older sister taking him places and paying for him. Yet, he’s excited to have more hot water in our home.

Just like one of my best friends, my husband just keeps encouraging me. This is the way it should be. We just have to trust. Our oldest’s wings are ready to fly. Yet, we know she has her roots and will find home for supper, her siblings’ events or a weekend.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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Enjoying Summer Days with My Kids

Enjoying Summer Days with My Kids

Netflix binges. Golf tournaments. Softball games. Cleaning closets. Reading. Extra screen time. Falling down the Twitter rabbit hole. Way too many frozen pizzas. Late nights on the deck.

As I try to blog this month I am quickly halted by writer’s block over and over. It doesn’t matter where I try to sit, where I try to think, there just doesn’t seem to be anything coming to me. In the past week between each new sunrise and the sunset of day, I had been searching for that topic, that connection to a new blog, to no avail. I just keep trying to find what I wanted to share about our summer days.

Supporting My Kids in Sports

Like many days of this summer, I am walking around the golf course following our son. I watched every drive, iron shot, chip or putt. I also watched every calculated play, the high fives, the fist pumps, the moment of frustration, the moments of failure and finally the hand shakes.

I walked off the course telling our son, Zephyr, how proud I was of him as he finished his round with a par. This par followed many double bogeys. We talked about the awesome 40-foot putt that he drained for a birdie. We discussed how to improve on all the failed shots. I told him how impressive it was watching his group problem solve and discuss rules. On this summer day, I needed to be a golf mom.

Yesterday, I was the mom who took our daughter to the softball fields to take grounders and practice hitting off of the tee. In that time frame, we discussed growth mindset—not every play is going to be perfect and there is always another opportunity to get better. We discussed letting go of the fear of failure. We discussed positive self talk. On this day, I needed to be a softball mom.

Making Dinner for My Family

Today, I needed to buy groceries. Summer grocery shopping usually means at least one of our children goes along with me (during the school year, it’s just me). Zephyr came along today, and he is my healthy grocery shopper. He looks for the best fruits and vegetables. He contemplates which sliced cheese we need to purchase. As we walked the aisles having conversations about what he wanted to try to bake or what we needed in our cupboards, I saw our son change from my little one to my teenager. Today, I needed to be a grocery shopper.

On this summer day, I was a mom making supper. It didn’t bother me that the bacon part of BLTs ended up tasting like cardboard (so I have heard). The bread was perfectly toasted, the tomatoes cut, the lettuce shredded, but I did fail miserably at microwaving bacon. Everyone still managed to eat the sandwiches. I may have failed at supper, but our daughter still requested “my go-to appetizer” of fiesta dip with chips. On this day, I needed to be the mom who failed at making supper.

My Role as a Mom

Tonight, I sat at the kitchen table helping my husband look through book orders and I listened to the quiet. Our oldest daughter is still in Texas, our middle daughter is at basketball camp and our son is downstairs. These past summer days, I have been struggling to find out what I wanted to share.

I realized that in between all of the normal things I get to do, there’s a reason for normal. There’s a reason that I get to have so many roles in my life. So next time in between the Netflix binges or the cleaning of the closets, I’m not going to look for the extraordinary. I’ll see what is ordinary because that’s where the lessons occur.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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Learning About Life Through Travel

Learning About Life Through Travel

I’ve listened to Matthew McConaughey’s audiobook Greenlights three times since I bought it in March. He starts out his memoir by discussing his approach to life and explained that he remembered more of his life than he forgot through reading his journals. This had me pondering what I wrote in my journals. This line caught my attention and I read it multiple times:

“I live life forward but I learn about life backwards.”

I don’t necessarily know why I wrote this as the writing around it did not go together. However, I do think there is some truth to this—learning about life backwards. Looking back, dots started connecting a long time ago to the trip my husband and I are on now.

Connecting the Dots

The dots to what this passage is teaching me started connecting three years ago after my mom passed away. I took my kids on the trip of a lifetime to all of my mom’s favorite places on the East Coast she dreamed about going to. It was nearly two weeks of learning and experiencing life in seven different states. Our family took the trip—mom never got to take the trip—but we did.

The dots continued connecting last May. After the end of the unprecedented school year, my husband took a five-day trip of self reflection. Even though I was completely nervous to send him on a trip of unknown roads across Nebraska, he needed this trip. He needed to reconnect with his purpose in life and look at life through his camera lens. I may have been scared for him, but I encouraged him and he chose to take the trip.

In November, the dots continued to connect. Our oldest daughter applied and accepted a summer position at a Christian camp in Texas. This is one experience we told her she could not turn down. She was excited about this opportunity but as time drew closer, nervousness crept in. We hugged her and gave her all of our love. Yet, she is the one who chose to get in her car and drive to this amazing experience.

Choosing to Take the Trip

Now here we are in May—one year after my husband’s trip. A trip to Jamaica with our friends, one we have planned since January. Through all of the unknowns and thoughts of “will we even be able to go?”, we passed our travel authorizations, took our COVID tests and took the trip. We chose to take the trip.

When we choose to take the trip, we live life forward and we experience life. Yet, when we look backward, we learn why choosing the trip is so important. Self-discovery, pursuit of passions but most of all, for me it’s the need to fill my bucket. As a mom and an introvert, I get emptied out quite quickly, and I needed the time of laughter and tranquillity.

When I choose to take the trip, life teaches me what I need to know at that moment. I just learn about life looking back. Next time life gives you a trip no matter how short or how long, choose to take it.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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Learning the Importance of Teamwork

Learning the Importance of Teamwork

Few of us ever work alone in our lives. We brainstorm and discuss new ideas, we collaborate, and in some instances, we ask for help. For many of us, we welcome working with others; yet there are also times where we would rather scream, “just let me do it alone.”

Trust me, I know the importance of teamwork and being able to collaborate with my peers. I know the importance of being able to formally collaborate and communicate in the virtual world. Yet, I also know the importance of an individual’s high expectations.

Working on Group Projects

All three of our children are at three different ages of school—college, high school and elementary—and they usually start out excited about group projects, but before long, they’re wishing they would have completed the assignment individually.

In most instances, I can’t blame them. It’s those dreaded thoughts of, “I’m going to end up doing all the work” or “this is going to be a disaster” or “I don’t want to fail this project because my partner didn’t contribute.”

For instance, our college age daughter was assigned a lab group for the entire semester, but one week into college one group member dropped the class. Halfway through the semester, another member rarely showed up to class. She often found herself collaborating on the reports with one other member while hoping the third member would somehow complete the portion he was assigned before the due date. Our daughter eventually felt it was necessary to email the professor to communicate the group dynamics and responsibilities.

Tips for Group Work

The maturity level of our college student is vastly different from our other two. Therefore, I must encourage the younger two to work through the challenges of group work and create a positive experience. Here are a few tips that I shared with my children:

  1. What is your expectation?
  2. Ask the group member(s) their expectation.
  3. Define the roles in the group.
  4. Create a timeline or follow the given timeline.
  5. Determine how your group will communicate information.

Group dynamics are always a challenge as are the expectations. Some members may strive for an “A,” while others just want to complete the assignment. However, having a discussion with the above simple tips allows our children to work through group projects and find the positives, while also encouraging them to not lower their expectations.

With each group project, our children develop a little more confidence in relinquishing responsibilities and trusting the other group members. And even though most times we may want to work alone, working with others is imperative as very few of us actually work alone in our daily lives.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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Keeping the Door Open to New Opportunities

Keeping the Door Open to New Opportunities

There are days where doors open for opportunities, and there are days where the doors are closed. Sometimes we slam the doors shut in hopes they never open again. And then there are those days where we shut the door only to walk away not noticing the door slightly creaks open.

Coaching High School Softball

Five years ago, I slammed a door shut on coaching high school athletics. I was ready to have more time for my family especially since my husband is a principal. Now, I am embarking on an adventure that five years ago I tried to slam the door on. However, unbeknownst to me when I turned my back to walk away, the door slightly opened.

After one year of not coaching, I was approached to join the high school softball staff. I was already at every softball game supporting our oldest daughter playing the sport, so I thought maybe it was a natural coaching move. Yet, deep down there was a desire to be back on the diamond. I walked through the door knowing I would have to be a student of the game and there would be challenges, but I just love this sport.

After four years of being an assistant softball coach, the door nudges open a little further, and the opportunity arose for a promotion to head coach. For the longest time, I kept pushing the door shut. Yet, the encouragement from my family gathered enough courage for me to step through the door and overtook the fear of being a head coach.

Being Open to Opportunities

I think life is this way. Just when I thought I slammed the door shut on coaching high school, it eventually opened again. This time though, I will be walking through the door with more confidence, more knowledge, and more of a desire to make this world a better place.

On the other side of this door is the opportunity to lead a program, to build servant-leaders while developing softball skills, and to leave an impact. Is it scary? Absolutely. Will there be joy? Yes. Will there be defeat? Yes. However, I’m glad I walked through the door, rather than standing on the other side and slamming it shut once again.

Where are you standing right now? Are you in the hallway looking at the door, or are you standing in the threshold? Are you slamming the door shut, or are you charging your way through the door with confidence? I encourage you—if there’s a passion in your heart and you have the courage, walk through the door and don’t keep slamming it shut.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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Refocusing When Life Gets Busy

Refocusing When Life Gets Busy

One year ago this month, our world changed. My profession, like so many others, was sent home abruptly as different sectors in the world started shutting down. Everything about that time brought fear, uncertainty and disappointment. Some of these feelings still ring true today. Yet, this time also gave me something that I’m actually missing today…time.

Juggling A Busy Week

I thoroughly enjoyed not having commitments every single night of the week. This week, I have longed for those unexpected days that were given to me a year ago. This week, the supper table conversations have turned into drive-through conversations. This week, the conversations with my husband have turned into 10-minute lunch meetings just to plan out the evenings (those of you whose spouses are school administrators probably understand this). The introvert in me has wanted my husband to take me for evening drives just so I could stare out the window and listen to the complete silence.

In a world where busyness is valued and the norm, I took it upon myself to relinquish some responsibilities. However, it seems that all of the commitments I did keep on my plate needed my attention this week. Don’t take this the wrong way—I’m grateful the world is returning to a new normal. Yet, I’m so thankful that I realized how precious family time is and I’m missing that this week. The stress of the busyness just hit me and I need to refocus. Refocus on what I value. Refocus on being mindful. Actually, refocus and listen to myself.

Spending Time to Refocus

This morning, I told one of my students, “control what you can control, which is your attitude and effort.” In this conversation, I realized I wasn’t listening to myself. I was letting my negative attitude about no free time control how I was actually using my time. Honestly, two things were happening this week—I wasn’t allowing myself to recharge and I was allowing too many distractions to happen.

To help combat these issues, I need to go back to the basics of time management. I need to plan ahead. This would be the reason why there have been many drive-through conversations this week as I didn’t plan ahead and grocery shop. I need to prioritize my to-do list by making micro-goals. I need to set aside time where my door is shut and my phone is in another room, which will help eliminate distractions. And finally, I need to quit multitasking.

If there is one thing I appreciate from COVID-19, it taught me the value of time. It just so happens that the past few weeks, I let the busyness of life get to me. I need to refocus on the big picture, set micro-goals and limit distractions. In doing so, I will ultimately free up the time I so long for.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

You may also like

Encouraging Your Child to Pursue Their Passions

Encouraging Your Child to Pursue Their Passions

Being a parent is amazing. It’s hard. It’s challenging. It’s tiring. It’s scary. It’s rewarding. The list could actually never end.

For me, one of the most rewarding moments as a parent is watching our kids pursue their passions. Maybe it’s the career and technical education teacher in me, but watching our kids find something they truly care about and dive into learning a new skill fills my heart with joy.

Learning How to Cook

Over a year ago, my mother-in-law taught our son how to make an omelet and ever since then, he has practiced perfecting his omelet-making skills. I didn’t think anything of it other than we now have a master omelet maker in our home.

This all changed about two months ago. Our son came home one day itching to learn how to dice vegetables. This is absolutely not in my wheelhouse. Thankfully, a dear friend of mine is also our culinary arts teacher at school, and knife skills are her expertise. She started teaching our son all about knife skills like slicing, dicing and chopping. Watching our son develop these skills each day is impressive, and I’m definitely enjoying having someone who likes to cook in our home.

Our son began writing a new story this past weekend as he decided he wanted to start a small business. If there’s anything that I’ve learned from parenting, it’s to not only provide our kids with many learning opportunities, but also foster an environment where failure is a learning opportunity. I couldn’t help but think what a great experience starting a business would provide for our son.

Starting His Small Business

As we began our discussions, my son had already decided on a business name, he looked at logos and designs for potential ideas, he knew the service he wanted to provide, he assessed his time commitment and he even typed up a mission statement for his company. Our son had weighed the pros and cons of this venture before even talking to us.

The teacher in me went into full teaching mode as my son and I discussed potential competition, pricing, how to create an order form, creating business spreadsheets and even packaging his products. He jumped in with both feet, excited and prepared. When he received an email from his first customer, the excitement in his eyes said it all.

Taking Risks

Here’s the deal about this entire experience. If I hadn’t realized long ago that parenting also encourages taking risks and not being afraid of failure, I would’ve talked my son out of this adventure. I liked staying in my safe zone, yet I learned this isn’t where learning takes place.

But I couldn’t discourage our son from taking a risk, knowing that he’s embarking on a great learning experience. Could he fail? Absolutely. But he’s going to learn more about customer relations, providing a service, marketing and accounting beyond anything I could ever imagine. This is the beauty of learning technical skills and creating experiences for our children.

As I started out my blog with all of the things parenting can be, it’s absolutely exciting and rewarding watching our children pursue their own passions.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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When Chasing Dreams Changes Course

When Chasing Dreams Changes Course

Many years ago, I read The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson. This book challenged my thoughts on chasing dreams and praying circles around my dreams and goals. It’s this time every year I go back and read my notes and highlights of the book. I spend much time reflecting on what I did and did not accomplish throughout the year. I reflect on the areas I struggled and reflect on those moments that brought joy and growth.

Reflecting on the Past Year

This year like any other year I am doing just that, however, I feel as though I missed something big this year. The stirring on my heart has been different. There are days I am quite envious of my family. I see my husband chase his lifelong goal of obtaining a doctorate of education. I watch our oldest daughter chase an opportunity to serve at a Christian camp in the summer. I see our freshman daughter conscientiously chase her goal of straight As in high school. I relish watching our son chase his goals on the golf course.

Yet, I tell myself to enjoy this moment or that I don’t have the time and resources to chase my goals. I also realize my purpose during this season is to support and encourage all of these dreams my family is chasing. Maybe this is the season of drawing my blueprint and laying the foundation.

I can’t help but think that what I’m chasing is looking different. I look through all of my big dreams that I have been circling in prayer, and I realize that during this stage of life some of those aspirations have gone to the wayside. Some of those aspirations are selfish and some I just do not want to continue chasing anymore.

Chasing a New Purpose

As I define my purpose and change my course, I need to continue laying the foundation to this stirring on my heart that’s bigger than myself. And as I reflect, I can see the blueprints had been started throughout the COVID pause as I learned that busyness is not a way of life. I gradually started taking things off my plate. This realization is going to help me clearly see what’s being placed on my heart.

Here’s to 2021—to chasing this new purpose and to circling this new dream with prayer and mediation. Before I know it, the stirring on my heart will show up in a big way and I will know exactly what my purpose will be. And right now, I need to let my family in on what’s on my heart. And as I said, when the big something shows up, I will have my family ready to encourage me to chase my dream.

I encourage all of you to see what’s stirring in your heart. How are you going to chase the dream in your heart in 2021?

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

You may also like

Fighting COVID-19 Fatigue

Fighting COVID-19 Fatigue

The notecard says “unplug and be thankful.” Life as we knew it changed in March. Our family made a choice to seek simplicity, extend grace and find joy in the quiet. Our family made the commitment to be intentional with our time together. Yet, this fall I faltered and gave into fatigue, gave into the negative. COVID-19 fatigue is real. It was (and still is) hard to be thankful.

There are days that I miss all the family time we encountered in the spring when COVID-19 halted our worlds. And honestly, I don’t want to lose those spring memories of how intentional our family was. Now, each day brings about feelings of being overwhelmed, exhausted and stressed. I could keep going on, however, I want to make a conscious effort to escape those feelings.

Therefore, I decided November was all about being intentional each new day. I want to be intentional about focusing on what I can appreciate this year instead of seeing the negative. I need to go back to the notecard, “unplug and be thankful.”

Being Intentional

When I focus on this mindset while not living my life on autopilot, I can see and appreciate how intentional my family is being right now. And seeing how intentional my family is during this time has been good for my soul and makes the feelings of being overwhelmed or exhausted melt away.

My husband and kids have made a conscious choice to be intentional. My husband has journaled every night since March reflecting upon his day. He has also been intentional about pursuing a doctorate degree in education even on those hard days. Our middle daughter has been intentional on healthy habits such as limiting her soda intake and a daily pushup routine. Our son has diligently been following his pushup routine while also finding time to read each day.

Fighting COVID-19 Fatigue Each Day

Nonetheless, being intentional is a choice. I long for simplicity. I long for love and being thankful. I long for grace. I long for a serving heart without compromising my own health. The choice is mine to make. The choice to unplug from the negativity and be thankful. The choice to not live my life on autopilot. The choice starts each morning with reading my notecard and ends each night with observing my family choosing to be intentional.

Those closest to me have been executing what I subconsciously have been telling myself I need to improve on. Their intentional natures will help me fight the negativity, fatigue and appreciate the good around me. And there is no better time to start being thankful than today.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

You may also like

Focusing on Positive Thoughts

Focusing on Positive Thoughts

As a coach, I tell my athletes there are always two things they can control: their effort and heart. In life, these are two things I can control — how much effort I put into my actions and whether I have positive or negative thoughts. A majority of the time, I consider myself a pretty positive person and look for the good in all situations, but goodness right now it is so bitterly hard.

Feelings of being overwhelmed, anxious, exhausted, concerned and finally tired. This school year has been all of these even when trying to look for the silver lining. As a teacher, I see all of the extras that are happening to keep our students and staff safe.

Worrying About Mental Well-Being

Yet, this is not what consumes my thoughts and tugs at my heart, it is the mental well-being of my colleagues and students. It is the mental well-being of my husband who is a principal. It is the mental well-being of my daughter, a freshman in college, who has all of her classes online other than a chemistry lab.

These are the moments where feelings of anxiousness, exhaustion and tiredness tug at my heart. I also find it hard to separate myself from the negativity that surrounds me. These moments seem to be more and more frequent. In these moments, I must go back to what I know: being kind, controlling my heart and controlling my actions. These three principles let go of the weight when the negative feelings keep crawling in.

The Importance of Taking Time to Recharge

No matter the busyness or how far behind I feel, taking time to recharge and be kind to myself is the starting point. The other night when all of our kids were home, we snuggled in our blankets with our hot cocoas and streamed a Christmas movie. Yes, a Christmas movie but we all needed the downtime to recharge. As a mom that is always serving our family, it is difficult to find time to recharge. Listening to encouraging podcasts while I clean, having a go-to playlist of encouraging music and focusing on positive/healthy daily habits are ways to recharge and reconnect with my life’s mission.

Two weeks ago, I went and visited my mom’s grave. I walked away from her grave site knowing that my purpose in life is still being fulfilled and I cannot grow weary in doing good. However I do need to intentionally think about my purpose. My mom always told me my purpose was to share joy. Joy comes from the heart, and I can control what my heart displays. When joy is not in my heart or negativity fills it, I need to be intentional. Intentionally seeking the good in our home, seeking the good in my classroom and seeking the good around me.

Intentionally thinking about what is on my heart and not letting negativity fill it is a challenge right now. Life is stressful and exhausting. However, I know by focusing on being kind, controlling my thoughts, while also developing positive daily habits, the weight of negativity will leave my heart and it will be filled with joy.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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Learning to Be More Empathetic

Learning to Be More Empathetic

Early in my teaching career, I took a strengths assessment, and I was not surprised at what was at the top of my list: achiever, discipline, learner and focus. I can see the many times in my life where all of these qualities are alive and thriving. For this specific assessment, all qualities that were assessed were listed from top to bottom, and at the bottom of the list was empathy. Seeing this ranking of words stopped me in my tracks.

I was annoyed and confused. I am a parent, a wife, a teacher, a coach, so empathy cannot be at the BOTTOM of this list. I know empathy means being aware of, and/or being sensitive to the feelings, thoughts and experiences of another. Yet, this is a hard topic for me. I want to be empathetic, but it just seems like this quality will never be part of my personality.

Trying to Be More Empathetic

Ever since this assessment, I have challenged myself to become a more empathetic person. Recently, however, I realized I have a love-hate relationship with this word.

There are times where I want to give someone a hug or show I care in some form, but it rarely comes across that way. When I practice being more empathetic, I usually play out the conversation in my head to find the right words…this obviously is not working. I recall three different situations where I was really trying to help and ended up causing more stress and made the person feel worse rather than better.

Why I Have Trouble with Showing Empathy

Reflecting upon those situations, I came to the conclusion that it’s a learned behavior. I feel sorry FOR the person rather than empathizing WITH the person. I try to be too positive and put a silver lining on everything, or I try to relate with a story that really has no connection to the situation.

Both of these are not necessarily wrong—they just don’t help. I’m not connecting. What I’m actually doing is minimizing the discomfort for myself as I really don’t know how to show empathy.

There are days when I want to say being empathetic is just not part of my wheelhouse and I need to quit trying to care and be sensitive to those around me. But is that really the right thing to do?

What I Can Do in the Future

Yet, I can do something about it. I can love those people and acknowledge their pain. I don’t have to always be positive about the situation or connect with a story. I just need to learn to listen and let people share their feelings.

While I am still annoyed that empathy is at the bottom of the qualities I possess and annoyed I am not naturally empathetic, I do realize I can still show love by doing something. And ultimately, that is the route I need to go—be silent and show empathy through love by doing rather than by conversing and storytelling.

Shelly Mowinkel

Shelly Mowinkel

K-12 & Teens

My husband and I have three kids. Our oldest is a freshman in high school, and our youngest is in second grade. Most days, I feel like we are a “tag-team chauffeuring” service, yet I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Not only I am a business/technology teacher at Milford, I am also the district technology integration specialist. I love teaching because I get the opportunity to make those around me better. My hope is that, through my blogging, I am able to inspire, encourage, and share with you my adventures of being a wife, mother, and professional.

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