I recently read a Facebook post with advice for a mom whose youngest child was starting high school.
The advice said to treat the years your child is in high school like going to an amusement park â ride all the rides, go to the shows, eat the junk food, and when it is time to go, leave with no regrets.
I like this fresh perspective on parenting through the teenage years.
Sometimes we get too serious about our high schoolers â we hyper-focus on college visits, grade point averages, being in the right activities, taking the ACTs, having the right friends, etc.
We forget that in four short years our little 13-year-old freshman will be moving out of the house, and weâll be kicked off the roller coaster.
As school starts this year, I have a freshman and a sophomore, so I am new to this amusement park. I donât know where all the good rides are or where to get the best funnel cake, but I have heard some good advice about how to relax and enjoy the show:
- Embrace what your child embraces: Buy the t-shirt, go to the game, work at the concession stand, and help out at the music competition. It doesnât matter if youâve never liked watching soccer â if your kid is playing go and cheer like a boss.
- Donât take it personally: High schoolers are moody and distant and donât laugh at our jokes. Let it go. But, be prepared to drop everything and take advantage of those times when your high schooler is home and in a chatty mood.
- Quit worrying: Dear helicopter parentâ worrying about every little test, homework assignment, friendship, date, ball game, Instagram post and audition makes you a complete nut case.
- Forget about your own high school days: Just because you participated in it in high school and had a blast or learned a lot doesnât mean your child has to follow suit. On the flip side, just because you didnât get to do it high school doesnât mean that your child shouldnât get to either.
- Be prepared for bad decisions: No high school student is perfect, and they will make bad decisions. Look at these as an opportunity to learn and grow and make a better decision next time.
- Make friends with your childâs friendsâ parents: You will find that you experience the same parental frustrations as everyone else, and itâs also a good way to keep tabs on what your teen is doing.
Good luck, parents! Obviously, we all have to make sure our kids are using the high school years to prepare for a life and career on their own, but letâs not forget to enjoy the roller coasters, fun house and snow cones. Before you know it, the park will close and weâll all have to take our souvenirs and go home.
Anne Blankenbiller
K-12 & Teens
Most of my mornings, afternoons, and evenings are spent driving the kids here and thereâand then back to here again. Every child is a gift on loan from God. As parents, our job is to raise that child to be an independent adult who can contribute to the world using the gifts and talents he or she was given. It is hands-down the most important job on earth!
