Can’t Tap My Way Out of This

Can’t Tap My Way Out of This

The world feels like it has stood still. Am I in Bill Murray’s Groundhog Day asking the questions, What day is it? What time is it? What’s to eat? Do I shower today or is that tomorrow?

As I’m sitting down to write my May blog, I’m trying to remember what I wrote about for April’s post. I have no clue. I worry if I’ll be writing the same exact words. Then I remembered I can reread April’s blog. Duh!

So much has changed in one month. Every time I leave our house, I wear a face mask. I wash my hands so much my fingers are wrinkly. OK, they were wrinkly before, but they are really wrinkly now. My hair color makes me look like a skunk with a big white streak running down my scalp. My fingernails are a mess. What I’ve realized is that this is the new normal.

Trying to Meet Goals

One of my goals last month was to Zoom with the grandkids once a week. We’ve only chatted on Zoom twice. The first time, it was just to connect together and it was perfect. The second time was when we all decorated Easter cookies.

It’s no one’s fault this hasn’t worked out more often. There seems to be virtual school still going on. Also, all of the grandkids work and their schedules frequently conflict. My only schedule is getting to bed at my normal time, which is sometimes when they’re just getting home from work. In spite of missing the mark with this goal, I continue my quest to touch base with them once a day.

The adjusted goal for this grandma is to learn something new each week. I give my grandkids the opportunity to suggest what the goal is, but I get to make the final decision. They don’t always know my physical limitations or my physical abilities. Heck, I may or may not know my own abilities or limitations.

Setting New Goals

This past week, I was challenged to tap dance. Our daughters took lessons, and the three granddaughters took lessons. I always loved the sounds, the rhythm, and of course, the recital costumes. I tap danced 65 years ago, so I knew it would come back to me quickly. I think they call it muscle memory. I decided to take tap dancing on as a goal.

The grandkids chuckled and were excited to see what I could accomplish. Actually, I don’t think that statement is true. That’s what they lead me to believe.

I quickly found a YouTube tap dance lesson online. I couldn’t find a lesson that was very long and involved, which was a blessing to me! You have to pay for those lessons. Here I go. Front toe taps, side toe taps, heel taps, ball change. These were all steps I recalled from my own lessons many years ago. What could go wrong other than the grandkids nagging me for my video?

Tapping My Way Through It

I danced in my Mary Jane shoes with a 1.5-inch heel as running shoes would not have been appropriate. Toe taps went well. Heel taps were good. Putting them together with a shuffle was not as good. It’s called balance.

What the heck was I thinking when I decided to wear heeled shoes when I haven’t worn anything but running shoes since the beginning of March? Yes, the balance was a bit off, and the video I made showed a tad bit of hesitation, but I did it and I’ll continue to shuffle ball changing once a week.

My tap dancing may bring humorous relief and take my grandkids’ minds off COVID-19 for a couple of minutes, but it won’t tap our way out of the pandemic. As long as the tap dancing video brings a smile to their faces, I’ve achieved my goal.

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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How My Grandkids & I Are Handling COVID-19

How My Grandkids & I Are Handling COVID-19

I always try to blog about what’s on my mind and how it connects me to my grandchildren. Last month, I was aware of COVID-19, but it hadn’t really affected my family or me. Although we currently don’t have any health-related problems, the virus seems to be impacting us on a daily basis.

Defining Moments in My Life

The pandemic has caused me to think about my past life-changing moments:

  • Nuclear bombs and our “duck and cover” under our desk practices
  • Landing on the moon
  • The Polio epidemic and vaccine
  • Assassination of JFK
  • Assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr., race marches, riots
  • Vietnam War and anti-war demonstrations
  • Women’s Movement and the burning of bras
  • Ebola, SARS, but I never thought about its personal impact on me

Defining Moments in My Grandkids’ Lives

Our grandkids’ life-changing moments prior to February 2020:

  • Getting a driver’s license
  • Going to college
  • School shootings and active shooter drills

Grandkids’ life-changing moments after February 2020:

  • Universities and public schools closed indefinitely, learning remotely
  • Sports schedules stopped
  • Knowledge of graduations which won’t be held
  • Uncertainty of summer jobs

Adapting to a New Way of Learning

All four of my grandkids are settling in with school work. I’m sure everyone of them is responding to the remote learning differently. One will work very hard on her assignments and complete them ahead of schedule and do more than required, hoping for extra credit. One will complete only the required work, hoping for the best. The other two will be somewhere in between, doing the work, getting it in on time, but not going above and beyond the requirements.

Now that I think about it, this is kind of how they work during the school year. I’ve decided not to ask how their school work is going, as I’m thinking their parents will put enough pressure on them already. They don’t need my inquiries. As a former educator, I’m anxious to know how this whole distance learning thing will work for the last quarter of the school year.

How I’m Handling the Pandemic

I’ve decided that my role during this pandemic is to stay healthy, find humor in the little things and connect with my grandkids at least once a day. One day, I sent them a joke about a guy who is paid to scoop up dog poop in the yard when he finally realized the homeowners didn’t have a dog. The grandkids thought it was pretty funny. Another day, I sent a picture of me doing the Jimmy Fallon Cowbell Challenge. They knew I played a cowbell at North Star High School, but couldn’t make the connection to Blue Oyster Cult’s “Don’t Fear the Reaper.”

I’ve sent them a picture of me trying to follow a YouTube video for beginning yoga. I think they were embarrassed for me trying to keep a downward dog pose. Finally, I’ve requested a Zoom session with the four of them once a week. It was good for me to see all of them last week, and they knew it meant a great deal to me. We’ve met once, and we’ll see if I am able to maintain my goal.

A lot of unknowns arise each and every day. I know that, and I’ll do the best to adjust to each one, even if one of the new things is learning new technology. I want to treat my book club to Zooming. Just when I thought I was done learning, I find myself needing more information to keep up with my grandkids.

The most important thing right now is to keep my grandkids safe and healthy. I know it’s really up to them and their parents, but I’ll do my part by trying to keep them smiling and smiling and smiling.

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Do Sequels Improve on the Originals?

Do Sequels Improve on the Originals?

Recently, I took one of my three granddaughters to see the newest Star Wars movie. I had seen the first three installments to the series, but had missed the past two or three. I enjoyed the movies I had seen in the past, and she assured me this one would be great as well.

Catching Up on Sequels You’ve Missed

Before the movie started, we talked about sequels and how sometimes they worked and sometimes they didn’t. I shared that Jaws one and two were good, but the third movie was not great. She mentioned the Marvel franchise, but I’ve never seen them, so I didn’t have much to contribute. We both liked the Indiana Jones and the Harry Potter sequels. Then we moved to Star Wars.

I told her the last Star Wars movie I saw was in 1983. She gave me the stinky-eye look—how dare I not keep up-to-date! She quickly moved on to explain the story lines I had missed and the characters I had no knowledge of ever existing in the story line. I tried my best to keep up-to-date. My only mistake was to ask if this is the movie with the Baby Yoda. Yep, I was the recipient of another stinky-eye look. Which movie was he in?

Understanding the Common Theme of Sequels

My granddaughter’s unabridged version of the movies I had missed were quite good. Knowing there was a link between the early movies and this latest one made me feel like I could handle the fact I hadn’t seen the entire series.
After the movie, we discussed it and we both gave it a thumbs up. Apparently, this latest movie is to be the last Star Wars movie. My granddaughter assured me there would be a spin-off in theaters soon. We also talked about the concept of sequels. When you’ve got something people like and want, keep it going. Each sequel has a common theme, yet is tweaked enough to make it special and each sequel has enough familiarity to identify with the main story line.

Each Grandkid Is a New Sequel

The sequel concept got me thinking about my own grandkids. Is each grandkid a sequel to the previous child? Does each grandkid learn from the previous one? Do they strive to be better, stronger than the previous grandkid? Like the movie sequel, each one of my grandkids has some common themes which run through them.

DNA would account for some of the common traits. My grandkids don’t look alike, but there are resemblances. Shared family values and beliefs is another common theme in movies and grandkids. All four grandkids grew up in the same church, went to the same day care, were involved in youth sports and eat the same food grandpa cooks.

While each of our precious grandkids are similar, they are each unique in providing their own twist to our family. Our grandson is very tall, his sister is very short and my other two granddaughters are in between the extremes. Are we like Jaws XXIV? No! However, I am thankful for all the similarities and all the differences I see in my grandkids. It makes life interesting and reassuring at the same time. Kind of like seeing the original Luke Skywalker through the years. May the Force be with you!

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Dressing Up Never Gets Old

Dressing Up Never Gets Old

I love the fall and especially enjoy the Halloween season. When my grandkids were little, I volunteered to be the witch in residence at the Lincoln Children’s Zoo. Maybe I wasn’t the witch in residence, but I read books to any kids who happened to stop by my chair.

It was a wonderful experience, especially when my grandkids showed up for story time. Despite my makeup and costume, they knew exactly who I was. When our grandson saw me, he yelled “Hi, Grandma!” Needless to say, those words caused a little confusion with the kids I was reading to. I let out a cackle and brought everyone back into the groove.

A Growing Costume Collection

After several years of reading at the Zoo, enjoying the interaction and getting my little kid fix, I handed my books over to the next witch. I did not, however, turn in my witch’s costume. Over the years, I collected many costumes, including our daughters’ numerous dance costumes. Some are worse for the wear, but I’ve still held on to them. I used costumes and hats as props for introducing concepts at staff meetings and to participate in student theme days.

It’s not the spotlight I crave, but the laughter I can generate. I think I always had more fun than either staff or students had. I may have become a bit overzealous as I probably have too many costumes and hats. The hats and costumes each have their own storage bins and do take up a tad bit of room in our basement.

Grandma to the Halloween Rescue

Enough background of my costume fetish. A week before Halloween, one of our grandkids called. I always think when I get a call, it’s because they want to talk to me. It’s so cute when they call, “Hi Grandma. How are you?” “Hi Grandma. What are you up to?” “Hi Grandma…” then, they have a follow up question, which is why they actually called.

This call was a request for cowboy gear. Yes, one of our granddaughters was going to a party, which had a Western theme. Did I have any hats, shirts, skirts, boots? I detected desperation in her voice, and I determined the party was the next weekend. Yep, but better late than never.

Bringing Joy With One More Costume

I did an inventory. Yes, we did have some items which might work for her. Hats, shirts, boots and bandanas were all available for her use. I took pictures and sent them to her. What would work and what wouldn’t work for her party. She picked out a few things and tried them on. Score another point in the win column thanks to the costume store in a corner of our basement.

It always brings a smile to my face when you can deliver for your grandkids. Maybe that’s why I try to watch my diet, chase the Pickleball and listen to my doctor. I just know these costumes may someday be needed for my great grandkids.

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Blow Us All Away

Blow Us All Away

It’s no secret that the Broadway show Hamilton played in Omaha during September. I first became interested in the show when it won every Tony Award in 2016. My enthusiasm grew even more when a graduate of Lincoln North Star had a role in the Hamilton touring company in Chicago.

Traveling and seeing the show in Chicago was not in our budget, so I had to experience her performance vicariously through friends. When I learned Hamilton was coming to Omaha, I was thrilled and knew we had to attend.

A Night Out at the Theater

The fun began when I told our grandkids we were planning on attending Hamilton. Wouldn’t it be thrilling if all four of the grandkids could go with us? Immediately, our grandson opted out for sports. I was a bit disappointed, but not surprised. The three remaining kids were thrilled and wanted to join us.

Unfortunately, two of them are in college and would not be able to return to Lincoln for the show. The final granddaughter was excited. The bonus was this particular granddaughter was about to have a birthday, so a night on the town was the perfect gift. My sister learned of our plans and wanted to join us as well, which meant four were now going. We were giddy with anticipation as we began making plans to enjoy a pre-show meal and the show. The date was agreed upon and tickets were bought.

Prepping By Getting to Know the Music

Weeks before attending the show, we all agreed to take turns listening to the CD to better understand the lyrics. But our granddaughter had been listening to the sound track on her phone for over a year. She also encouraged us to listen and even gave us a synopsis of the Alexander Hamilton story. We all agreed and it was indeed helpful.

We watched the show in awe of the dancing, silently singing each of the songs, and basically, the entire story. It truly was everything we had anticipated and more. After the show, the four of us talked about our favorite songs, favorite characters and favorite scenes. We each had different favorites, but all agreed the show was perfect.

We also loved the idea of combining so any different music genres into one show. I remarked I had never had rap as my “go to” music genre. Our granddaughter gently suggested to me the reason I’ve never liked rap was because I never knew what words were being rapped. She was right, of course!

Similarities to Today’s Politics

Our discussion moved beyond sharing our favorites. We started talking about how much of the story had never been taught in school. We never really knew the politicians in Hamilton were so backstabbing, aggressive, didn’t listen to other opinions and believed the party agenda should always be first. Our granddaughter commented on the similarities to what’s happening in Washington, DC today, and it seemed to her we haven’t learned many lessons from our country’s early history.

The show was the highlight, but an equally rare highlight was rapping with our granddaughter. I doubt she would call what I was doing as rapping. She even let me cheat by reading the lyrics. Not sure when we’ll have a rapping duet again, so I’ll cherish the memories we created that night. Or maybe I need to create rapping as a new holiday tradition!

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Succulents Suck

Succulents Suck

This summer, we had a granddaughter working at one of those pop-up green houses. Her location was near one of the Super Savers in town.

I bought a flat of marigolds and planted them early. She was a great help in picking out the color and size of the plants. Not to brag, but I thought I did a pretty good job of planting the flowers. They began to grow and provide some colorful blooms. Then the monsoon rains fell, and fell, and continued to fall. The marigolds were planted in a small trench around our curved backyard patio.

Rain, Rain, Go Away

The flowers did not come with life jackets or scuba gear, so they drowned in the standing water. I asked my granddaughter what I should do. She assured me the plants would probably not make it, but it would be wise to be patient and wait until the rain stopped and the sun dried things off. As you recall, the rain continued to fall and the plants were a total loss. She suggested I buy more plants and start over in a couple of weeks.

That’s what I did. I followed my granddaughter’s instructions and I bought another flat of marigolds to start the process over. I wanted to give her a little more business, so I bought some succulents. I had some in past years, but it had been a while. I thought it was time to grow some again. My granddaughter encouraged this purchase, probably because she knew they wouldn’t be washed out by the rain.

Succulents Sucking the Fun from Gardening

She helped me pick out a variety of succulents, all of which looked rather exotic. I purchased six—five of them would go into a large container and the sixth to be planted in an individual pot. After more purchases, I planted everything and was pleased with the process and results.

About a month later, my granddaughter showed up at our house. I’ve seen her several times within the month, but our visits are not as frequent as when she was young. I miss conversations with each of the grandkids. However, their lives have gotten busy and I understand—plus, they have to make money for college! When she came into our house, she was looking around the kitchen and living room for a small picture frame she wanted to borrow. She noticed the succulents in the big container and said, “Grandma, don’t you ever water these?” I responded with a hem hawing, “yes?” Then she told me they were too dry and would die. I thanked her for her advice. She smiled at me, found the picture frame and gave me a hug.

A month later, my granddaughter came to our house to take part in a family meal and looked at the succulents. “Grandma, you are over watering the plants. They will die.” Of course, I wanted to tell her to make up her mind, but I did not. She was right. Some of the leaves were dropping off and the plants were starting to look pathetic. She suggested the ice cube method of watering plants. Who would have thought you could put an ice cube in the pot and that would be enough water to feed it.

It’s All a Balancing Act

I realized then there was a lesson to be learned—there needed to be a balance in watering the succulents. Likewise, there needs to be a balance in being a grandma of growing grandkids. If I pay too much attention to them, (i.e., texts, calls, concern because I don’t see them enough), they feel smothered. The other extreme is not paying any attention to them, never texting or writing to them and they will forget me. OK, they won’t forget me, but you get the picture.

Whether watering the succulents or being a loving, nurturing grandma, finding the right balance is the key to a healthy relationship. The challenge is finding a balance in a constantly changing world. I’m up for that challenge. As we age we can either watch the world in our rear view mirrors, or through our windshield as new things come at us. The art of grandparenting, if done right, pays us huge dividends

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Life Is Full of Puzzles

Life Is Full of Puzzles

The other week I went to Omaha to visit my sister, her husband and our foreign exchange student visiting from Norway. Bjorg stayed with us during the ’62-’63 school year. Although we’ve seen each other about every seven years, all of us understand those transatlantic trips get more difficult with age and our visits may be numbered. We made the most of every minute we were together. During the week, we went to the Henry Doorly Zoo, Lauritzen Gardens, Old Market, Joslyn Art Museum and more. Each site was special and we loved the time to explore and get reacquainted with each other and the venue.

Visiting the Joslyn Museum was an especially fun day. The four “grandparents” were joined by my sister’s daughter and her three children, as well as her daughter-in-law and her two daughters. Even though all of my sister’s grandkids live in Omaha, I don’t get a chance to see them very often. They are all incredibly active in sports, cheerleading and work—not much different from my own grandkids. I thought about it and realized I really only see my sister’s grandkids on holidays and for a few birthdays. So I was determined to make this Joslyn visit count as a time to remind them who Grandma Nancy is.

Piecing Together Time with Everyone

Where are they? It was as though the adopted grandkids were always one step ahead of me throughout the entire museum. I did catch site of the two girls entranced with Degas’ Little Dancer, but by the time we came to the piece, the girls vanished. I realized my time with Bjorg was more important, so I stopped stalking them.

The grandmas and grandpa finally caught up with the grandkids in the museum gift shop. My sister and Bjorg found the jewelry counter, my brother-in-law stayed out of the shop completely, and I was enthralled with the toys, especially a wooden puzzle. It appeared to look like a mini two-dimensional Rubik’s Cube. The girls came up behind me staring at the puzzle I was trying to complete. We knew what the puzzle should look like when completed: 12 mini cubes arranged in a 3 x 4 shape. We also knew the “try me” sample I held in my hand was in a straight line. They looked at me and challenged me to put the straight line form into the 3 x 4 completed shape.

diffiuclt multicolored puzzle

Try, Try, Try Again

I tried. I tried again, and again. What was I missing? I handed it to one of the girls. She looked at it for three seconds and completed the puzzle. She handed it over to me with this smug look on her face. I undid the puzzle and gave it to her younger sister, thinking surely this little girl wouldn’t be able to complete the task. She, like her sister, took a moment to look at the pieces, then quickly completed the task. I gasped and grabbed each girl, hugging them until they giggled with glee. They laughed hysterically at Grandma Nancy. Their laughter increased when they again challenged me to complete the puzzle. Nope, I couldn’t do it.

At the end of our visit when we were saying our goodbyes, the girls surprised me with a gift of the wooden puzzle. They said they wanted me to have it so I could practice putting it together; we had another good laugh.

Not All of Life’s Puzzles Are So Simple

When I got back to Lincoln, I looked at the puzzle in its neat 3 x 4 rectangle. How could this silly thing be so hard? I refused to touch it for a day. But the next day, I was determined to figure it out. As I began rearranging the pieces, I noticed how it was put together. How the pieces were notched and how they were held together. Oh, it now made sense. I then remembered how each girl took time to analyze the situation prior to jumping in to complete the puzzle like I had done—lesson learned.

I also noticed the puzzle’s recommended age, 3+. Was this a test of a senior citizen’s brain versus a young brain? It certainly was a good reminder for me to analyze a situation or puzzle before attempting to solve it. I also give credit to educators for not just teaching kids what to learn, but more importantly, how to learn. I am thankful I can continue to learn from all of my grandkids. Maybe Grandma Nancy should go back to school!

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Educating My Grandkids Through Sewing

Educating My Grandkids Through Sewing

My entire life has had both teaching and learning aspects in it. My mom was a Normal School teacher in a one room school house in Saline County. She taught at Crete Public Schools while getting her bachelors degree. She was a great role model. Although I didn’t initially think I wanted to go into education, it was the profession I finally chose to pursue. So I guess teaching was my DNA. I found it would carry into other areas of my life.

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Family Sequels

Family Sequels

I was watching the evening news the other day and after the story I felt I was having a deja vu experience. I asked myself, “When was the last time the government took the action the news was reporting?” We’ve been here before and it didn’t turn out well then and it may not turn out favorably this time. It had me thinking—do we review the past to improve the future, or are we as a society, constantly changing and things will never be the same?

Can Sequels Help Us to Learn, Retain and Become Better?

I thought of my time as an educator, and it seemed like curriculum and strategies were always changing. Each year seemed like a sequel to the previous year. How can we help students learn, retain and become great citizens? Teachers are better prepared now then they were in the early 70s, so the sequel concept in education works.

I’m not quite sure why I used the word ‘sequel’ to discuss education. The word sequel usually refers to movies or books—Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, etc.

Since the grandkids only liked to do group reading when they were young, I’ve focused our sequels to watching movies with them. I’ve always liked watching movies with the grandkids. Whether it’s watching movies at our house or taking them to the movie theater, the time together has been precious. It has always been a fun time, but is much less frequent than when they were in elementary school.

Then, they were eager to be picked up and share a movie and lunch with grandma. I really believe they were more excited about getting away from their parents. I think they still enjoy our outings, however, those are few and far between. School, sports, travel and friends all compete for grandma time. TV movies are the next best thing to going to the theater, but even those occasions are less frequent. Sequels are fun to watch together. Reviewing the past movies and anticipating the future ones are great discussions.

When we do watch a TV sequel, it’s usually something they’ve heard of or have at least seen the first movie of the series. Spiderman, The Avengers, Star Wars are a couple which pop into my head. I thought of the sequels I watched growing up, such as the Rifleman and Gunsmoke. Those sequels were aired frequently and not very well done, but it was all we had. A line the grandkids always love hearing—not!

Do We Review the Past to Improve the Future?

When we have these very important discussions, the grandkids always respond politely. We all agreed you can’t judge a sequel by it’s first movie or even it’s last. Not all sequels, or all movies within a sequel, are similar in quality. Every one is unique, but with some similarities. We came to the conclusion most of the Star War movies were good and probably will continue to be good. Who knows how many more installments of Star Wars will be made. Characters like Chewbacca and R2D2 brought a strong connection to each movie. The first Jaws movie was the best of the later Jaws movies, but the sequel probably should have ended after the second movie. I mean, how many killer sharks are out there? Wait a minute—as global warming comes into play, we hear more and more about people being attacked by a shark, so maybe the sequel will continue.

It had me thinking about sequels in our family. We all have similarities, such as our background, values, upbringing, education and income. Our family’s sequels are similar, yet we are so distinctively different. It was an interesting discussion and really made us think about our lives—where we’ve been and where each of us is going.

When we talk about sequels or series, whether it’s movies or family members, do we review the past to improve the future? Do we learn from each other’s experiences? I would guess we all do so individually, but I know I don’t tell the grandkids what they should learn from my mistakes, I try to keep all my mistakes to myself. I’m also confident their parents will share all my sordid mistakes with them, ha.

Deep down, we are all originals and we are uniquely diverse. We have different story lines and different genres, but we are still interconnected. Although our family is not a ‘love story’ sequel, there is an abundance of love shared.

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Grandmas Get Pimples

Grandmas Get Pimples

One day last week, I woke up with a sore in the corner of my lips. I didn’t think much about it but the next morning it was bigger, redder and hurt just a tad. It wasn’t time to call the doctor, but I wanted to keep my eye on it.

What started as a stressful week worrying about my skin ended in a lovely moment with my granddaughter.

Do I have a cold sore?

My husband always struggled with cold sores so when my spot first appeared I asked what he thought. He didn’t think it was a cold sore. Skeptically, I asked him if you spread cold sores by kissing. He laughed at my question and went out the door to play golf. The love and support were overwhelming! I could never complete with golf.

On the third day, the center of my sore was getting dark and hard. Even though the spot was only the size of a pinprick, I decided to apply Campho Phenique cold sore cream and burn it to death. By the fourth day, there was no change.

I tried to occupy my time by running errands. I ran over to my daughter’s house to drop off a book. My daughter wasn’t home so my granddaughter came to greet me. She gave me a big hug and then looked at me. She started to laugh hysterically.

Did I have food in my teeth, or something hanging from my nostril? It took about two seconds of laughter before she squealed, “Oh, my gosh, Grandma. You’ve got a zit on your face!” A zit at my age? How could that be?

A lesson in skincare

My granddaughter had bad acne between 8th and 11th grade. It caused her a lot of grief and she made many trips to the dermatologist. After multiple trial and errors, they finally found a plan that worked and she no longer gets as anxious over the situation. Bottom line, she’s an expert and knows what a zit looks like and how to contain it.

I had her look at my lips so she could be 100% sure it was a pimple. Tears were streaming down her face from laughing. She’d never heard of a grandma having a zit. The bump was definitely a zit and not a cold sore and it was in the corner of my mouth.

I was shocked. I hadn’t had a pimple in at least 45 years. I’m struggling with age spots and dry, blotchy skin, but now I need to add zits to the list?

My hysterical granddaughter knew exactly what to do. First, she gave me a hug. Second, she quickly found a tube of Clearasil and gave me application instructions. Clean the area, then gently dab the Clearasil to the pimple. She told me it would be gone in two days. I thanked her for the advice, although I really did remember how to get rid of pimples. Unfortunately, my routine for getting rid of pimples always started with popping them. I didn’t tell her that.

Returning the favor

After our session, she gave me a high five and said, “You’ve always been there to give me advice and I’m glad I can now return the favor.” Wow! She really is growing up. I know I will always need technology advice, but this was different. Getting sentimental over a zit is another new experience for me. As we hugged goodbye, her final comment to me was, “At least you’re not going to prom tonight!”

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Reading Michelle Obama’s “Becoming”

Reading Michelle Obama’s “Becoming”

I love to read. Since retiring, I joined two book clubs and thoroughly love both. I find myself reading novels I didn’t even know existed and enjoy the challenge of learning and living within each book.

I’ve always wanted to read a book with my grandkids, but unfortunately reading is a school assignment to them. There have been times where I read the same books as my granddaughters. When the Harry Potter book series was published I purposely read the novels at the same time as my granddaughters. Unfortunately, my grandson was not as interested in the wizarding world, so once again he was left out.

The girls and I really enjoyed the process of ready and discussing the Harry Potter series. We celebrated by going to see the movies together. As I recall, we didn’t read the entire series, but reading, discussing and watching the movies together was priceless. I often wonder if we would ever read a book together again.

This holiday season I finally got the chance to restart the family book club with Michelle Obama’s Becoming.

Restarting the Family Book Club

This holiday season one of my granddaughters saw my book club list on the kitchen counter. She was surprised I was reading Becoming by Michelle Obama for that month’s book club meeting. My granddaughter had heard of the book in school and even asked to borrow it! 

Oh my! Could this be happening? Were my ears deceiving me?

Yes, my family book club was happening again! Even if our family book club only had two members and read this one book, I would’ve been thrilled! 

After reading the book we came together with our thoughts and questions about Becoming. I was very curious to see her discussion topics and questions. Amazingly, she left politics almost completely out of the picture, preferring to focus on the process of “becoming” or changing. What defined a becoming moment for Michelle Obama? What life changes and the emotions that followed led to those big moments of becoming? 

Our “Becoming” Moments

It was a great discussion. We reflected on our individual becoming moments. What led to those moments and how did they help make us the people we are today?

Sports were a predominant theme for my granddaughter’s becomings. A coach who really pushed her to the next level, a teammate who made her laugh, yet focus too. Those specific moments helped her pause and reflect on how these individuals shaped her into the person she is today. 

Although I am further along in my life, I shared with her that I, too, am still changing through my own becoming moments. I hope I never stop.

My granddaughter and I are similar in our passion for our community and helping others, but the process of becoming as a grandma is different from becoming as a grandchild.

My granddaughter’s mentors are challenging her to become an adult in a new and exciting world. I, on the other hand, have mentors my same age. We still challenge each other to learn, but it’s different. I no longer strive to be the best educator in the world now that I am retired. My focus is now on those becomings which can transform me into a better and more loving grandmother to my grandchildren and support them through their becoming moments. 

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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Breaking Through to My Grandkids

Breaking Through to My Grandkids

For many reasons, communicating with teenaged grandkids can be difficult. I know I’m a lucky grandma because my grandkids live near me in Lincoln. However, I still don’t get a chance to see them as often as I would like, and even though I can see my grandkids every day, I may not be communicating very well. As my grandkids continue to get older and become more independent, I’m finding that I need to adjust my expectations to stay in touch.

Feeling Out of the Loop

I always thought of myself as adaptable, but adjusting to less communication with my grandkids was not something I ever anticipated.

My grandkids’ lives are different than they were in elementary and middle school. Now, they’re on their phones, they drive, they work, they study, they’re in sports, and sometimes they even have a “special” friend. I am not complaining! All my grandkids are growing into hard-working, young adults and they make me proud each and every day. However, maintaining quality conversations amongst all these distractions is hard.

I assumed my grandkids would always want to see their grandma and tell her what was going on in their lives. I still think my grandkids want to see me and talk to me, but I’m now competing for other things that need their attention like school, work and friends. I get it. These are life skills, which will turn them into wonderful, caring adults but that doesn’t mean I’m happy about it.

In the Good Ol’ Days

As I write this blog, I’m reflecting back on my days as a teenager and my relationship with my grandparents. (Hmm, maybe I should have reflected on this before I started writing this blog!)

My greatest memories of my grandparents were when I was in elementary school. I would help my maternal grandmother work in her garden and she’d let me eat peas right out of the pods. I’m sure I made a dent in her yield! I remember visiting my paternal grandparents’ farm and learning how to collect eggs from the chicken coup. Collecting eggs, while avoiding the chicken poop, was always a challenge.

When I grew up and started high school, there were movies to see and friends to meet at the swimming pool or on the ice pond for skating. And, yes, I even did some studying. Come to think of it, maybe things aren’t so different?

Turning the Corner

There is something different now: technology. The phones, the texting, the instant communication has made it easier than ever to stay within arm’s length. So, maybe I don’t have it so bad after all? My grandkids don’t usually initiate a text, but they always respond when I send one.

This blog is certainly not ending as I intended. I think I’m ending it with my first, and maybe only, New Year’s resolution, albeit a little late. From now on, I’ll text each grandkid at least three times a week, but rather than telling them what I’m doing, or asking them questions about their day, I will just send them a positive statement. Something like what my grandparents said to me:

  • I’m grateful for you.
  • You have great ideas.
  • I love being your grandma.
  • I believe in you.
  • You are important.
  • You make me proud.

I’m not going to feel sorry for myself that I can’t speak to my grandkids as much as I want. I feel loved, needed and eager to show my grandkids how much I love them. Some things may have changed, but luckily some things will always be the same.

So, forget the Debbie Downer form of me in the first part of this blog. Focus on the positives, love your grandkids, and remember, you’ll need to change just as much as them!

Nancy Becker

Nancy Becker

Grandkids & Grandparents

I have four grandchildren ages 14-17. In some ways, I’m a very typical grandma, always proud of everything the kids do and wanting to help support them in whatever way I can. In other ways, I’m not very typical. My goal as a blogger is to share my thoughts and experiences that I think are funny and meaningful as I adventure through grandmahood.

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