“Cohen, Great-Grandma has died. Do you know what that means?” I said.
“Yes, it means she’s in heaven,” he said.
We recently had a death in the family. My grandma passed away. I’ve explained the concept of death to my son before, but we’re now dealing with it on a more personal level.
After the arrangements were made, I had to plan for the funeral, which meant picking out outfits for my children. I realized all of Collyns’ dresses are bright and cheerful—not what I was wanting her to wear to the services. So off to the store I went. Call this my retail therapy!
Finding kids clothes for a funeral is tough, especially if you don’t want to spend a small fortune on a child’s suit or dress. But after three stores, I finally found outfits and shoes for both kids at minimal expense.
Mitch and I had a conversation about whether the kids should go to the rosary and/or the funeral. We wanted to go as a family, but Cohen is five, and Collyns is two—and you may recall that she can be naughty at times.
The truth is, I remember going to many funerals when I was younger and being completely freaked out by that body in the coffin. Even today, I don’t look at the body if there’s an open casket. Part of me thought I should spare them this reality. Then again, it’s part of life…right? Would exposing them to the funeral be too confusing for them? I worried it would give them nightmares instead of a better understanding of life.
Luckily, the funeral was in town and during the week, so daycare was an option. We decided Cohen was old enough to attend both the rosary and the funeral. But Collyns would only attend the rosary, then go to daycare during the funeral.
We told them a rosary is kind of like “quiet church.” We bribed them with candy. As expected, Collyns didn’t want to sit still or be very quiet for the entire rosary. She made it through most of it, but towards the end, she’d had enough.
We talked to Cohen about what happens at a funeral. We just prepared ourselves to deal with whatever questions and concerns he had afterward. However, Cohen was so good! He sat quietly with his cousin and watched.
In the end, I think he was glad to be a part of this, no matter how sad it was. I also found that I handled the whole thing much better than I usually do with him there with me.
Mallory Connelly
Babies & Toddlers
In addition to the time I devote to being a mom, I also work full-time outside the home, which means my day is hardly ever as simple as nine to five. With an all-too-established schedule, as soon as I walk through the door, my day doesn’t end, but rather just begins. It’s a balancing act, especially with two children, but being a mom is one full-time job that I never want to quit!
